9.02.2010

One of Those Military Wife Lessons

Hey ya'll! I'm pretty freaking stoked because I have The Mrs. posting today. I just love this girl. She's one of those real life friends as well as a BB. She's fabulous as is her blog. She tells it like it is and we have very similar personalities. Keep in mind that this is a post from  her own experience and she's not lumping all young military wives together. This is about a very special group we have dubbed The Drama Llamas. Enjoy!


"I'm sure most of the people reading this are wives. I'm not sayin' there aren't military husbands, but let's be real.. they are few and far between and I'm sure most of them don't blog in their down time. Anyway, with us all being women we all know the drama that surrounds us in life. (We all know it does, don't try and act like your life has been 100% drama free). If you're like me, you want to be accepted, especially in this crazy military life. Most of us got thrown into this lifestyle not knowing a damn thing. So what do we do? We find other women that are in the same position and try and be friends. If you moved with your husband during tech school/AIT I'm sure you know exactly where I'm going with this.

We find ourselves trusting people extremely fast and deeply. We feel that we have some sort of common ground so these people are alright.. right? WRONG! These (usually young, immature) wives are just like they were the year previously in High School. These women (girls) aren't ready to be ripped away from mommy and daddy and definitely not ready to budget, grocery shop, cook, clean or even have normal adult friendships. Above all they just aren't ready to be wives. (Especially wives that send their husband off to war.)

Part of me blames movies for this. I feel like movies make marriage to be a wonderfully easy cakewalk and well as you probably know it's far, far from.

Now I met the wonderful Mrs. S. while our husbands were in Tech School. Along with her I also met two other.. um.. girls. One became my roommate and the other one was Mrs. S. (Now looking back we should have switched and everything would have been perfect.) It became a clusterf*ck very, very fast. Between the other two girls there was infidelity, pregnancies, lying, abuse and DRAMA. Everywhere they went it was drama. When you're already sucked in there isn't much you can do.

So what do you do when you're surrounded by the typical young military wife? RUN! Run fast and far away. Haha, just kidding. They aren't all bad, but just be careful. Now, on the other hand, I've met some absolute awesome military wives. The kind of wives I thought everyone would be. The ones where I could call day or night and know they'd be here for me.

It's difficult to make friends in general, but when you throw the stress of deployments and moving around every 2-3 years in the mix most civilians just don't understand. That's why it is SO important to make military friends, but watch out because some are just flat our CRAZY!"

12 comments:

Jamie said...

Haha! This is great, I love it! I appreciate the honesty. I've found I don't have much in common with as many military wives in "real life" for this very reason. I'm so far removed from my high school days, and that's a good thing in my book : ) I'm glad I've found other women online I can connect with a relate too!

Chelle said...

I absolutely can not stand the young military wife nor the crap that follows them. I hate the cliques they form and their annoying mean girls stench they ooze from their pores. And I absolutely can NOT stand the 5 of them that all got pregnant in the same month, then proceed to give me crap for keeping my legs closed. Hmm that would be because I have enough spawns of satan heathens running around my place and would like to be able to drown my annoyances with beer when the deployment comes ladies.

And I've rambled long enough. lol So with that I agree!

Catherine said...

Ditto on the honesty!

I too am over the whole high school drama stuff. For this very reason I have removed certain people from my life.

Steph said...

I couldn't agree more. I even know a few of them. It stinks but I just try to avoid them.

Mrs. Doc Handsome said...

I love this post. I can relate to the drama front in general from military wives of all ages! It seems like instead of competing and thinking that this lifestyle is going to be perfect, us military wives should unite and get through the hardships together.

Sarah said...

That's probably the number 1 reason I didn't make friends while my husband was in AIT. That and I was there for less than 6 months. But, those wives are NOT limited to AIT/tech school. Since we've been "regular army", I've met some EXTREMELY immature women that are significantly older than I am. I only have a few military friends for that very reason. I wish more of them were wives from Joe's unit, but...it's slim pickins!

JG said...

You know, it's funny. Most of the more mature wives I've been around here have been the brand-new military wives, not the (slightly) older, more experienced ones. (I'm sorry, but who organizes a "superhero themed" Hail and Farewell? Doesn't that seem a little Sorority to you?) I'm not disagreeing with you at all! I have a hard time being around them, too. Especially when there's a constant "we're here for you to look up to us" attitude and they are stuck in high school.

Anonymous said...

It seems to me that Drama Llamas come in all ages and ranks. In my opinion, the older ones are the worst because they know all the tricks that the younger ones haven't learned yet.

C said...

I completely agree! I have definitely struggled to find women with whom I have something in common.

I seriously have never heard so much backstabbing, fake niceties and disgusting medical-related information (ugh, if one more person tells me about their staples falling out I'll be sick).

And then they (force) invite one another to jewelery parties.

I don't want your homemade quartz crap, and I certainly don't want your homemade drama.

Mrs. H said...

I TRULY appreciate this. I was talking to my good mili friend about it earlier, and oh goodness gracious...some girls (particularly girlfriends who are actually STILL in HIGH SCHOOL), conjure up the CRAZIEST drama. I'm glad there are still ladies that are level-headed and awesome like you seem to be :)

hmb said...

I don't think it should be narrowed down to young ones....A lady I volunteer with on occasion (all three kids at least in middle school) is in a war with her neighbors...where they egg each others cars, toilet paper their yard, there was a tire slashed in there somewhere...

Ummm....???

I'll just stick with my dog :)

Unknown said...

LMAO! Too true!!! I can't stand the crazy-makers. They are obnoxious!

I think movies definitely give a false sense of love. But they only ever show up to the point where the couple falls in love and gets married. They never really show the marriage itself...because that's not the stuff of love stories.

Great post! Thanks for sharing!