Do you think there are ever moments in our lives where if we had done just one thing different, no matter how small, we wouldn't be where we are today?
Think about that.
Now do you believe that our lives are on the courses they're on because that's the way its always been planned? Maybe not destiny per say, but regardless of the decisions we've made, we are exactly where we're supposed to be? Even if we had taken the left fork of the road instead of the right, we'd still end up in the same place?
I've always had the mantra of "No Regrets!" because without every single one of the decisions and choices I've made, the people I've let into my life, I wouldn't be the person that I am right now. I've also been raised with the belief that our lives, our families, every obstacle that is thrown in our way, was CHOSEN by us, for us before we came down here to do the whole Earth thing.
I chose to lose my babies?
I chose to be raped?
I chose to not be able to have kids?
Most of the time, that is REALLY hard for me to reconcile myself to but I think deep down, I still believe it.
Back in the summer of 2009, Mr. Superman was gone at BMT and I was living with my parents in Arizona. I ended up having surgery and getting my gall bladder and appendix removed about 3 weeks before I was to drive the 17.5 hours from Gilbert, AZ to San Antonio, TX to attend his BMT graduation. While living with my parents and confined to the couch, I tried to acquaint myself with the military world. I read everything I could, blogged about my end of the BMT experience and posted his letters, discovered military blogs, joined military spouse forums and found a military spouse Facebook group that allowed you to connect with the significant others of the people that were also at BMT and would be graduating the same time as your loved one.
After weeding out the whiners and crazies, or so I thought, I began regular correspondence with 4 military wives whose spouses were going through BMT at the same time as Mr. Superman and who would all be graduating the same weekend as him. It was a HUGE relief to be able to talk with other wives that were going through all of the same emotions as I was and as his graduation drew closer, I got more and more excited to not only see my husband but to also meet these girls who seemed so nice and who had made this experience a tad easier.
Now at this time, I had never even heard any of the stereotypes regarding military wives and tales of infidelity, contract marriages, drama llamas and I had NO idea what a tag chaser was.
My good friend guest blogged for me a while back and actually inconspicuously shared her thoughts about this very thing. Drama Llamas and the very people involved in this story which you can read HERE. She says it perfectly. As new spouses to the military lifestyle, you develop friendships and trust very quickly despite the oft times shallow and superficial nature of the people in the relationship.
Oh naivety.
I think I just automatically assumed that other women going through this huge lifestyle change and transition just like me, would be sweet, kind, and full of pride and love for their husbands. Little did I know that one of these women would soon be a part of the most horrendous thing that has ever happened to me.
I made the long drive to San Antonio with a friend and the few days spent there were so much fun. Seeing Mr. Superman at the Airman's Run was a shock. That crazy kid had lost 35lbs and 4 1/2 inches off his waist! Watching his flight at the Coin Retreat Ceremony was the first time I experienced that overwhelming pride inside my chest. The sting of tears in my eyes, my heart beating and racing so fast I thought everyone around me could hear it, the smile so huge my face hurt. I've felt that same pride innumerable times since then and it has got to be one of the most incredible things that comes with this military lifestyle that I am SO grateful for. Being able to come down from the stands and search for my man was chaotic but the minute I saw him and got that first tight hug, everyone and everything disappeared.
In the course of all of the events that weekend, I was able to meet up with two of the four wives I had been corresponding with and it just so happened that one of them had a husband who was in Mr. Superman's Brother Flight. She was a bit young but seemed to love her husband and told me she couldn't stand to be away from her husband for another 3 months while he attended Tech School in Wichita Falls, TX so she was renting an apartment down there. I was a bit envious so without giving it a second thought, I jumped at her invitation to pay half the rent and come down there too.
See Mr. Superman every weekday for an hour or two and longer every weekend? Yes please! Plans were made for this girl to drive down to Wichita Falls and leave her belongings and car with a friend, get on a flight to Arizona where I would pick her up and she would drive with me from Arizona to where our husbands were. She made a point to let me know flying was never an issue because her mom was a flight attendant. Nice! After driving the 17.5 hours from Lackland AFB back to my parents house in Arizona, I packed everything up, picked up this new friend from the airport, loaded my car, and began the 24 hour drive to Shepard AFB.
Looking back now at my choices leading up to me being in Wichita Falls, TX on October 4, 2009, I view everything differently. Every single conversation, every single thought and nagging feeling. Certain things seem so clear and obvious now while others, I don't know if I'll ever truly understand. I told you that I have a hard time reconciling myself to the belief that before I left God, I chose to live this life I'm living. The hurdles placed in my path, the hardships I've faced, and the heartache I've felt... I chose all of it. Regardless of what you or I believe, none of us has the power to hit the rewind button or the delete button. The things that have happened to us, the things we have done, the years that we have behind us, they happened, they were, and that fact won't all of the sudden cease to be.
I was naive.
I was betrayed.
I was raped.
I was choked nearly to death.
I was humiliated.
“But the past cannot be changed, and we carry our choices with us, forward, into the unknown. We can only move on.”
―
Libba Bray,
The Sweet Far Thing
To read the other posts where I open up about my attack, they can be found on my 'I Am A Rape Survivor' page.
Showing posts with label Guest Blogger. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Guest Blogger. Show all posts
5.21.2012
12.14.2011
MilSpouse Holiday Blog Swap 2011
(NOTE: The Swap doesn't go live until Midnight EST but my computer was too excited to wait)
Hey there Lovelies!! Merry Christmas! I am so excited to be participating in this year's
![]()
I jumped on that wagon as fast as I could! Be sure to head over to Riding the Roller Coaster's wonderful blog (or just click that adorable little button) to check out all of this year's participants and even if its just a few, go visit and leave them some comment love!
Don't be a blog comment Scrooge otherwise you'll get some ghoulishly haunting visits from the Ghosts of Blog Comments Pas, Present, and Future.
As for me, today my post for the Blog Swap can be found over at Faith & Deployments and lucky you, its a video blog! Go listen to me jabber on and on about our holiday traditions.
Hey there Lovelies!! Merry Christmas! I am so excited to be participating in this year's
Don't be a blog comment Scrooge otherwise you'll get some ghoulishly haunting visits from the Ghosts of Blog Comments Pas, Present, and Future.
As for me, today my post for the Blog Swap can be found over at Faith & Deployments and lucky you, its a video blog! Go listen to me jabber on and on about our holiday traditions.
Now to the main event. I have the beautiful and wonderfully talented JG here sharing with us a little insight into her family's Christmas!
One of my favorite things about Christmas was always going over to my Grandma and Grandpa's house. I have something like 60 cousins on that side of the family, counting all of my cousins' kids. Not everyone gets to make it every year, but it's the best day of the year, getting to see everyone who has moved away and only gets to come back once or twice a year. Now, we're one of them. We don't do presents, really. The little kids get presents, 12 and under. But before anyone can open any presents, we sing Christmas carols. Yes, we do.
this particular year was during an Oklahoma-style blizzard, so it's a smaller crowd than usual
Every year, we sit around my Grandparents' TV and pop in the old Mickey's Christmas Sing-A-Long VHS in the VCR and sing along with the bouncing Mickey head. It is by far my favorite 10 minutes of the whole season. Everyone sings, the little kids and the parents and the grandparents. And we've got a lot of talented people in my family, so it's actually a quite enjoyable experience, with harmonies and embellishments. It's a blast.
Then the video goes off and the kids say, "Let's open presents!" And my dad says, "How about we sing the video one more time???" And they all yell, "NO!" Every. Single. Year.
My Grandpa died a few years ago. My Grandma died in September. Christmas won't be the same without my grandparents.
This year, we aren't meeting at their house. We're all still getting together. We're going to do the sing-along. We're going to enjoy our family. And we're probably going to talk about them a lot. I'm not really sure what to expect, but I know we'll all miss them. And I know it'll make them happy to know we're all together.
Sounds like a good time to me. Now get going on making the rounds!
Merry Christmas Lovelies & Happy Holidays!
4.12.2011
Kitchen Magic With Merrill Family Deep Thoughts
Lovelies! Here we are again with another fabulous line up of guest bloggers to entertain you all while I am busy cleaning our new house from top to bottom, grocery shopping, and all of the ever-important mani/pedi, spray tan, waxing, and hair appointments in preparation for the big HOMECOMING!! I am so glad I have all of these wonderful Lovelies stepping in for me so I can focus on the important things not to mention so I can be sure to take breathers in between my anxiety attacks. So please be sure to show all of my wonderful Lovelies lots of love because they deserve it. Today, I have my cousin! Yay for family right?! I wish I was super domesticated like her. She's like supermom with twin boys and doing all this fabulous food savvy stuff. Enjoy!!
So, our lovely Mrs. S. or as I call her, Rachelle, is my cousin. Our mothers are sisters and we grew up in a very large extended family seeing each other at massive Thanksgiving meals, family reunions in the summertime and our Aunt Kay's gigantor gift-givings at the annual Christmas parties. I love staying in touch with her and reading about all her adventures here on her blog and on Facebook. So, I was honored to be given the chance to do a guest-blog post and hope you like it. My family blog is Merrill Family Deep Thoughts, where I document the goings-on in my family and crazy mind.
My life is busy. I am a wife, which can keep you busy. Last year, I became a mother, which can keep you even busier. I am a mother to 15-month old TWIN boys, which undoubtedly keeps me busier than I could ever imagine.
Since I stay home with my boys now, I have taken on the task of becoming more domestic, especially in the kitchen. I wanted to start meal-planning, sticking to a grocery budget, start contributing to food storage and have fun with trying new meals. The tricky part was achieving all of that within money and time constraints. When you add two more mouths to feed and take away a full-time salary, the grocery budget gets a bit tighter. As you can also imagine, I don't have all day long to tend to the affairs of the kitchen. So, I started developing ways I could save money, save time and most of all save my SANITY, when it comes to food and organizing my kitchen.
I would never claim to be an expert in this arena. I am not reinventing the wheel here and some of you probably do some of these very things that I have only recently discovered and you probably do it better. I am an admitted Google-junky and much of what I do now was found by doing an online search. But, I wanted to share my strategies that I have come up with to help me and my family. Here we go!
Knowing what you have in your kitchen can be invaluable knowledge. It helps you on a daily basis, when you need to throw a meal together quickly. It also is great when meal-planning and making a grocery list. I used to get so mad at myself for buying something at the grocery store, only to get home and realize I already had plenty of it. Keep track of what you have on hand in your pantry, refrigerator(s) and freezer(s). Post it in a convenient place and update accordingly, as you use items. I taped my lists directly onto my freezer or the inside of my cupboards. When you use up an item entirely, put it on your re-stocking shopping list.
Online Resource: Organized Home Checklists
This is a website that has checklists for your entire house, but in my case, I mainly use the kitchen inventory sheets. It has inventory sheets for your freezer and pantry, shopping checklists and weekly menu planners.
This is the only food group that I am going to mention specifically, but I think it is the most important. It’s healthy for you and your husband and your kids and your grandkids and for everybody! When you buy produce that is in season and on sale, you will not spend as much as you think. You reap the immediate benefits of fresh and yummy produce, but also the long-term benefits of healthier eating. I get most of my produce from a food co-op that has weekly baskets of produce to buy. There are food co-ops, farmer's markets and grocery store ads that can give you great produce buys. Research what your options are in your area and see what you can find.
Co-op Directory Listing
This is a great website to discover where food co-ops are in your area. Food co-ops are usually ran by volunteers and pool resources together to get everyone the best produce at the lowest prices.
Bountiful Baskets
This can be easier said than done. Everybody has their own methods. I prefer to wait until I get my produce basket for the week and then plan what we will eat that following week. You might want to use the weekly grocery ads and see what is on sale first. Any way you want to start out, follow that up by using your pantry/freezer items and your fresh produce to plan 5-6 meals for the week. I like to leave at least one day open for leftovers or special occasions, if needed. Get ideas from everywhere: a recipe book, a website or your own mind.
Allrecipes
I know that we all have our favorite recipe websites. Allrecipes.com is on the top of my list. Besides having great user reviews, the ability to customize recipes for your family sizes and pictures of almost every recipe, it has a great feature called, Ingredient Search. You can quickly type in asparagus and that chicken breast you have in the fridge and find a delectable recipe to make! I just typed those two items in and got a result of 41 recipes. It is genius.
This website takes the idea of an ingredient search and kicks it up a notch. You can enter EVERYTHING in your kitchen and it will automatically find online recipes that you can make. The more you add, the more specific the recipes can be. It even tells you which recipes you can make right now, because you have all the ingredients in your kitchen already.
I found this cute printable meal planner and loved the idea of using it on a weekly basis. Just print it out, laminate it and use dry-erase markers to keep track of your weekly meals. If you don't like this meal planner, find one you do like and hang it in your kitchen somewhere. It helps you and everyone else in your house stay on track and know "what's for dinner?".
I break down my shopping into three categories:
Depending on my budget, I can choose to buy from one, two or all three categories. Some weeks, I only buy the staples and fresh produce and make meals with only what I have in my kitchen. Other times, I may buy a few items to complement my meals. When I have extra money in the budget, I will focus on re-stocking those items I have run out of or even building on my food storage. My next goal is to start setting aside a little money each week to put towards a food storage plan.
Online Resource
Food Storage for $5 a Week
This is just one of the countless plans you can find online for food storage. It is easy and only uses $5 or less, on a weekly basis, to build your food storage. It's a good beginner's stage, which is definitely where I am at.
When I get home from grocery shopping, I make sure to not only organize and store food in a way that makes life easier, but that can also save money in the long run. If you bought a big package of meat, break it down into separate freezer bags to make it last for several different meals. If you have a lot of produce, wash it, cut it and store it in the way to make it last longer. For example, I have noticed that if I just stick a head of celery in my fridge as it came, it wilts quickly. But if I take the time to wash it, cut and trim the ends and store it in a re-sealable bag, it lasts much longer.
Online Resource
Produce Freshness Chart
I follow this chart religiously. I have it posted on my fridge and store every piece of produce accordingly. I never knew that cantaloupes should be kept in the fridge or that cucumbers should be kept out on the counter. Since I started following this chart, my produce lasts SO much longer. It is even color-coded for added convenience.
Try to not waste ANY food if possible. If it comes to the end of the week and you just don’t have a use for a food item, try to use it in a recipe that you can freeze for later or even give away to a neighbor. Use those overripe bananas to make banana bread for your neighbors. Squeeze those oranges and freeze the juice for recipes later. Try a new recipe with the odds and ends you are left with at the end of the week and you may be pleasantly surprised. At the end of the week, I will even start googling my leftover foods to see what I can freeze. I have orange zest, green onions and turkey stock in my freezer, because I didn't want to throw anything away! I was surprised when I discovered how much I could actually freeze, if I did it right. Another great way to be resourceful is canning your food. This is an area that I have just starting scratching the surface of, but am excited for the possibilities.
So, there you have it. My (not really) secrets to having an organized kitchen and meal plan that can save you money, time and sanity. As you can see, there aren't really any new concepts here. Just a pooling together of strategies and ideas to help us all out. If you have any questions, feel free to email me at skrd116 at gmail dot com.
Thanks again to Rachelle for asking me to do this. Hope you enjoyed it!
So, our lovely Mrs. S. or as I call her, Rachelle, is my cousin. Our mothers are sisters and we grew up in a very large extended family seeing each other at massive Thanksgiving meals, family reunions in the summertime and our Aunt Kay's gigantor gift-givings at the annual Christmas parties. I love staying in touch with her and reading about all her adventures here on her blog and on Facebook. So, I was honored to be given the chance to do a guest-blog post and hope you like it. My family blog is Merrill Family Deep Thoughts, where I document the goings-on in my family and crazy mind.
My life is busy. I am a wife, which can keep you busy. Last year, I became a mother, which can keep you even busier. I am a mother to 15-month old TWIN boys, which undoubtedly keeps me busier than I could ever imagine.
Since I stay home with my boys now, I have taken on the task of becoming more domestic, especially in the kitchen. I wanted to start meal-planning, sticking to a grocery budget, start contributing to food storage and have fun with trying new meals. The tricky part was achieving all of that within money and time constraints. When you add two more mouths to feed and take away a full-time salary, the grocery budget gets a bit tighter. As you can also imagine, I don't have all day long to tend to the affairs of the kitchen. So, I started developing ways I could save money, save time and most of all save my SANITY, when it comes to food and organizing my kitchen.
I would never claim to be an expert in this arena. I am not reinventing the wheel here and some of you probably do some of these very things that I have only recently discovered and you probably do it better. I am an admitted Google-junky and much of what I do now was found by doing an online search. But, I wanted to share my strategies that I have come up with to help me and my family. Here we go!
Inventory
Knowing what you have in your kitchen can be invaluable knowledge. It helps you on a daily basis, when you need to throw a meal together quickly. It also is great when meal-planning and making a grocery list. I used to get so mad at myself for buying something at the grocery store, only to get home and realize I already had plenty of it. Keep track of what you have on hand in your pantry, refrigerator(s) and freezer(s). Post it in a convenient place and update accordingly, as you use items. I taped my lists directly onto my freezer or the inside of my cupboards. When you use up an item entirely, put it on your re-stocking shopping list.
Online Resource: Organized Home Checklists
This is a website that has checklists for your entire house, but in my case, I mainly use the kitchen inventory sheets. It has inventory sheets for your freezer and pantry, shopping checklists and weekly menu planners.
Buy Fresh Produce
This is the only food group that I am going to mention specifically, but I think it is the most important. It’s healthy for you and your husband and your kids and your grandkids and for everybody! When you buy produce that is in season and on sale, you will not spend as much as you think. You reap the immediate benefits of fresh and yummy produce, but also the long-term benefits of healthier eating. I get most of my produce from a food co-op that has weekly baskets of produce to buy. There are food co-ops, farmer's markets and grocery store ads that can give you great produce buys. Research what your options are in your area and see what you can find.
Online Resources
Co-op Directory Listing
This is a great website to discover where food co-ops are in your area. Food co-ops are usually ran by volunteers and pool resources together to get everyone the best produce at the lowest prices.
Bountiful Baskets
This is the food co-op that I belong to. I have fallen in love with this organization and anybody who is friends with me on Facebook will see my weekly pictures of all the goodies I get. Baskets start at only $15/week and they operate in Arizona, Colorado, Idaho, Montana, Nevada, Oregon, Texas, Utah, Washington and Wyoming.
Meal Plan
Online Resources
Allrecipes
I know that we all have our favorite recipe websites. Allrecipes.com is on the top of my list. Besides having great user reviews, the ability to customize recipes for your family sizes and pictures of almost every recipe, it has a great feature called, Ingredient Search. You can quickly type in asparagus and that chicken breast you have in the fridge and find a delectable recipe to make! I just typed those two items in and got a result of 41 recipes. It is genius.
This website takes the idea of an ingredient search and kicks it up a notch. You can enter EVERYTHING in your kitchen and it will automatically find online recipes that you can make. The more you add, the more specific the recipes can be. It even tells you which recipes you can make right now, because you have all the ingredients in your kitchen already.
I found this cute printable meal planner and loved the idea of using it on a weekly basis. Just print it out, laminate it and use dry-erase markers to keep track of your weekly meals. If you don't like this meal planner, find one you do like and hang it in your kitchen somewhere. It helps you and everyone else in your house stay on track and know "what's for dinner?".
Prioritize Needs
- Staples-whatever your needs are on a weekly/bi-weekly basis. For example, in our house we get lots of whole milk, bananas and Cheerios as our weekly staples.
- Meal Needs-whatever you need to make your dinners for that week.
- Re-stocking/Food Storage Needs- items that have run out in your pantry, refrigerator or freezer. Also a good way to regular build your food storage.
Shop Smart
Depending on my budget, I can choose to buy from one, two or all three categories. Some weeks, I only buy the staples and fresh produce and make meals with only what I have in my kitchen. Other times, I may buy a few items to complement my meals. When I have extra money in the budget, I will focus on re-stocking those items I have run out of or even building on my food storage. My next goal is to start setting aside a little money each week to put towards a food storage plan.
Online Resource
This is just one of the countless plans you can find online for food storage. It is easy and only uses $5 or less, on a weekly basis, to build your food storage. It's a good beginner's stage, which is definitely where I am at.
Food Prep
Online Resource
Produce Freshness Chart
I follow this chart religiously. I have it posted on my fridge and store every piece of produce accordingly. I never knew that cantaloupes should be kept in the fridge or that cucumbers should be kept out on the counter. Since I started following this chart, my produce lasts SO much longer. It is even color-coded for added convenience.
Be Resourceful
Try to not waste ANY food if possible. If it comes to the end of the week and you just don’t have a use for a food item, try to use it in a recipe that you can freeze for later or even give away to a neighbor. Use those overripe bananas to make banana bread for your neighbors. Squeeze those oranges and freeze the juice for recipes later. Try a new recipe with the odds and ends you are left with at the end of the week and you may be pleasantly surprised. At the end of the week, I will even start googling my leftover foods to see what I can freeze. I have orange zest, green onions and turkey stock in my freezer, because I didn't want to throw anything away! I was surprised when I discovered how much I could actually freeze, if I did it right. Another great way to be resourceful is canning your food. This is an area that I have just starting scratching the surface of, but am excited for the possibilities.
So, there you have it. My (not really) secrets to having an organized kitchen and meal plan that can save you money, time and sanity. As you can see, there aren't really any new concepts here. Just a pooling together of strategies and ideas to help us all out. If you have any questions, feel free to email me at skrd116 at gmail dot com.
Thanks again to Rachelle for asking me to do this. Hope you enjoyed it!
4.11.2011
MilGirl Status With Semper Gumby... The Return of Sunshine!
Lovelies! Here we are again with another fabulous line up of guest bloggers to entertain you all while I am busy cleaning our new house from top to bottom, grocery shopping, and all of the ever-important mani/pedi, spray tan, waxing, and hair appointments in preparation for the big HOMECOMING!! I am so glad I have all of these wonderful Lovelies stepping in for me so I can focus on the important things not to mention so I can be sure to take breathers in between my anxiety attacks. So please be sure to show all of my wonderful Lovelies lots of love because they deserve it. I'm so happy to have Reina here tody. She's a dear friend. When we talked about what she wanted to write about, I was stoked because it hits home with me. Before Mr. Superman deployed I had felt very targeted on several occasion from other MilGirl's. I was told we had it so easy and didn't understand military life because we had never gone through a deployment. So thank you Reina for writing about this!!
You're a Miliie/MilGirl, you're proud of your guy for serving our country! Damn right you are! Have you wondered, though, that there are "types" of MilGirls out there. Even if you don't necessarily think this way, there might be others around you, in your real world or in your bloggy world. This isn't true of ALL MilGirls; I'm just identifying something that I've observed, a vibe that I've felt...
I've found that other MilGirls judge you based on whether or not your guy's been deployed. They judge you if YOU haven't survived a deployment with him. They judge you that you're "only dating" a sailor. They judge you because you're a Coast Guard wife, the "other" military service.
I am attending program for Social Work in hopes that someday, I can become a civilian military social worker. I started an organization devoted to students at the school to be able to learn about military specific issues as related to social workers in the field. I am clearly committed and passionate about the topic of serving military service members and military families. I'm also waiting to marry my Marine.
Unfortunately, from the early days of my relationship with Dave, I have struggled with the judgmental, condescending messages from other MilGirls. No, he's never deployed to Iraq or Afghanistan. He has deployed on other missions. He has served his country honorably and he intends to do so again as an officer. He has volunteered himself when volunteers were needed for relief missions such as Haiti. Sometimes, you just don't get picked.
The thing is, though, that it's not about the Marine, or the Soldier, or the Sailor, or the Airman. It's about the larger mission. It's about America and the World. They play a vital part in the functioning of the machine so that those who are on the front lines can do their job. They are also the ones holding down the fort in other lonelier parts of the world. So, to say that you haven't served as a service member or a family of that service member for their DAILY SACRIFICES, is ignorant and tragic.
Perhaps it's an insecurity on these MilGirls' parts that they feel superior to anybody whose man hasn't been deployed. Or, maybe they feel like they need to strut because they don't have anything else going for them but their service member that they're proud of (which is not to say that that's not something to be proud of...). If you want to compare the effects of deployment vs. non-deployment, clearly, there are some significant levels of trauma that need to be accounted for; however, there are also significant changes in lifestyle that can also result in severe mood disorders that are manifested in the service member or the family. You're comparing apples to grapefruits, really. They're both fruit.
I think it's completely and utterly unnecessary to compare. It's one thing to talk about your experiences through deployment or sharing stories, but those people who are being judged sure as heck don't feel like you are better than them. Because, we're all Team America. We buy into all of it and in the end, we are on the same side. We cheer for our guys and gals. It doesn't matter what your service member is doing to serve his country, he's serving just the same. We are all proud.
MilGirl Status
You're a Miliie/MilGirl, you're proud of your guy for serving our country! Damn right you are! Have you wondered, though, that there are "types" of MilGirls out there. Even if you don't necessarily think this way, there might be others around you, in your real world or in your bloggy world. This isn't true of ALL MilGirls; I'm just identifying something that I've observed, a vibe that I've felt...
I've found that other MilGirls judge you based on whether or not your guy's been deployed. They judge you if YOU haven't survived a deployment with him. They judge you that you're "only dating" a sailor. They judge you because you're a Coast Guard wife, the "other" military service.
I am attending program for Social Work in hopes that someday, I can become a civilian military social worker. I started an organization devoted to students at the school to be able to learn about military specific issues as related to social workers in the field. I am clearly committed and passionate about the topic of serving military service members and military families. I'm also waiting to marry my Marine.
Unfortunately, from the early days of my relationship with Dave, I have struggled with the judgmental, condescending messages from other MilGirls. No, he's never deployed to Iraq or Afghanistan. He has deployed on other missions. He has served his country honorably and he intends to do so again as an officer. He has volunteered himself when volunteers were needed for relief missions such as Haiti. Sometimes, you just don't get picked.
The thing is, though, that it's not about the Marine, or the Soldier, or the Sailor, or the Airman. It's about the larger mission. It's about America and the World. They play a vital part in the functioning of the machine so that those who are on the front lines can do their job. They are also the ones holding down the fort in other lonelier parts of the world. So, to say that you haven't served as a service member or a family of that service member for their DAILY SACRIFICES, is ignorant and tragic.
Perhaps it's an insecurity on these MilGirls' parts that they feel superior to anybody whose man hasn't been deployed. Or, maybe they feel like they need to strut because they don't have anything else going for them but their service member that they're proud of (which is not to say that that's not something to be proud of...). If you want to compare the effects of deployment vs. non-deployment, clearly, there are some significant levels of trauma that need to be accounted for; however, there are also significant changes in lifestyle that can also result in severe mood disorders that are manifested in the service member or the family. You're comparing apples to grapefruits, really. They're both fruit.
I think it's completely and utterly unnecessary to compare. It's one thing to talk about your experiences through deployment or sharing stories, but those people who are being judged sure as heck don't feel like you are better than them. Because, we're all Team America. We buy into all of it and in the end, we are on the same side. We cheer for our guys and gals. It doesn't matter what your service member is doing to serve his country, he's serving just the same. We are all proud.
4.08.2011
Deployment Clock With Goodnight Moon
Lovelies! Here we are again with another fabulous line up of guest bloggers to entertain you all while I am busy cleaning our new house from top to bottom, grocery shopping, and all of the ever-important mani/pedi, spray tan, waxing, and hair appointments in preparation for the big HOMECOMING!! I am so glad I have all of these wonderful Lovelies stepping in for me so I can focus on the important things not to mention so I can be sure to take breathers in between my anxiety attacks. So please be sure to show all of my wonderful Lovelies lots of love because they deserve it. Today I have Amber from Goodnight Moon. I love this woman. She is so honest and says what most people are too scared to. She's hilarious and has four of the most delicious chickens she calls her own.
You know the dreaded “D” word….D.E.P.L.O.Y.M.E.N.T.
It just glooms over your head like a storm cloud, where most days it actually thunder storms down on
you but on some days you might have a rainbow peeking out. Those rainbow days are awesome and
you hold onto those days as long as possible because you know that before long, another storm cloud is going to be lurking over your head.
While you’re going through your deployment, it seems like the days are never ending and the hours go
by so slowly during the day. Once you “x” off your days and are finally at the end of a month, you flip the calendar over only see another slew of days you have to get past. It is exhausting.
But have you noticed that when you are going through your deployment, the days/weeks/months just
lag on and on and on? But when you’re “SO” is home, and somebody else you know is going through
their deployment, it seems like their time went by super fast? It’s like “wow, your deployment went by
so fast, didn’t it feel that way to you”? The answer is always no! No, my deployment didn’t go by fast, it lagged and it sucked the life out of me from time to time.
But once you’re “SO” is finally home with you, safe in your arms, you realize that it seems as though no time has passed at all. All those months of being without one another, only seems like a mere memory. As if no time has passed at all.
So even though it may seem as if someone else’s deployment is going by fast for YOU, it never is for the person who is going through it themselves.
You know the dreaded “D” word….D.E.P.L.O.Y.M.E.N.T.
It just glooms over your head like a storm cloud, where most days it actually thunder storms down on
you but on some days you might have a rainbow peeking out. Those rainbow days are awesome and
you hold onto those days as long as possible because you know that before long, another storm cloud is going to be lurking over your head.
While you’re going through your deployment, it seems like the days are never ending and the hours go
by so slowly during the day. Once you “x” off your days and are finally at the end of a month, you flip the calendar over only see another slew of days you have to get past. It is exhausting.
But have you noticed that when you are going through your deployment, the days/weeks/months just
lag on and on and on? But when you’re “SO” is home, and somebody else you know is going through
their deployment, it seems like their time went by super fast? It’s like “wow, your deployment went by
so fast, didn’t it feel that way to you”? The answer is always no! No, my deployment didn’t go by fast, it lagged and it sucked the life out of me from time to time.
But once you’re “SO” is finally home with you, safe in your arms, you realize that it seems as though no time has passed at all. All those months of being without one another, only seems like a mere memory. As if no time has passed at all.
So even though it may seem as if someone else’s deployment is going by fast for YOU, it never is for the person who is going through it themselves.
4.07.2011
My Blogging World With Hold On, Love
Lovelies! Here we are again with another fabulous line up of guest bloggers to entertain you all while I am busy cleaning our new house from top to bottom, grocery shopping, and all of the ever-important mani/pedi, spray tan, waxing, and hair appointments in preparation for the big HOMECOMING!! I am so glad I have all of these wonderful Lovelies stepping in for me so I can focus on the important things not to mention so I can be sure to take breathers in between my anxiety attacks. So please be sure to show all of my wonderful Lovelies lots of love because they deserve it. Today I have the lovely Beka from Hold On, Love. She is incredibly charming and one of the sweetest Lovelies I have. I asked her for her take on a peek inside her blogging world.
"Q: I was wondering if maybe you'd want to write about how you got started in blogging, what kinds of blogs you read, what attracts you to reading those blogs..."
A: I just procrastinated a little bit and watched/listened to this song by the civil wars; one of my favorites in the music world. Why on earth would I do that? Procrastinate? Heck, it's only the first time I've ever guest-posted, and it was the lovely Mrs. S. who emailed me with the request. My goodness, I got excited :) I've loved her blog for a while. So....before I put this off till tomorrow or the next day with an excuse such as a blank brain or something, let me say a couple things: I'm beka, and I love to blog, I love to write, cook, bake, paint, take walks, brew coffee, and photograph all of the above.
So, when I started blogging . . . it was not for me. I set up a blogger account to co-write a webzine type of blog for young women: cameratismo. Too bad everyone's lives got super busy and we hardly posted after it got started up. My first post for my blog was on September 13 2009. It was lyrics from a song I was obsessed with at the time. (It's still a really really good song.) But within a few months, I was . . . hooked. Though yes, I admit, I freaked when, at around 12 followers, a linkless follower clicked that f-button. For a while I was wondering if I should go private, if there were creepers out there reading my stuff. I've since gotten over that. I questioned a blogger friend up and down about her take on it all, and I felt safe with the advice she gave. Ha. I've posted recipes, paintings I've done, days that were beautiful, and random scenes and stuff that struck me as funny...such as some of the ones with the label siblings. ;)
The kind of blogs I read varies . . . Mainly, blogs that post things that I'm interested in, or blogs that are written by friends, and thus, I enjoy reading them no matter what. So. If I comprised a short list of subjects of blogs I follow? It would be mommy blogs, foodie blogs, military blogs, photography blogs, traveling/European blogs, decorating blogs, and you all know those just plain old freaking creative blogs.
The top things that attract me to the blogs I read are: The aesthetics of the site. Relatively clean, unjumbled (yes, I just made that word up ;), organized, purposeful, and, to an extent, carrying the taste and personality of the author. --Still talking about the look of the blog, not yet the actual content.
And if it's only one or two of the above characteristics mentioned, and I follow it, you know I find the writing worth it all. I'm a person who prefers space to think and read the blog, not be cloistered.
*laughs at self*
I love it when I find a blog where the writer, whether practiced or not, just says it as it is. Whether they're poetic, blunt, or just everyday, they're usually one or two of those together. Heck, you might run into a really wonderful blog where the author happens to (subconsciously) be all three.
Photos attract me. Food attracts me. Beautiful people do, too. Writing, most of all, has attracted me.
People have diverse ways of saying things. They have different --or completely mirrored-- thoughts about the same general subject, and yet their heart can come through in the writing, and the shades and tints of speech and phrases are different . . . and that's what makes it lovely.
I love that there are different styles, different feels to the text and emotion that is published. Yeah, I was kind of obsessed with the word different.
This was a pointed post, and my normal blog posts have the tendency to be quite random. And sometimes amusing. So, there you have it: some of the whys and hows of my blogging experience thus far.
"Q: I was wondering if maybe you'd want to write about how you got started in blogging, what kinds of blogs you read, what attracts you to reading those blogs..."
A: I just procrastinated a little bit and watched/listened to this song by the civil wars; one of my favorites in the music world. Why on earth would I do that? Procrastinate? Heck, it's only the first time I've ever guest-posted, and it was the lovely Mrs. S. who emailed me with the request. My goodness, I got excited :) I've loved her blog for a while. So....before I put this off till tomorrow or the next day with an excuse such as a blank brain or something, let me say a couple things: I'm beka, and I love to blog, I love to write, cook, bake, paint, take walks, brew coffee, and photograph all of the above.
So, when I started blogging . . . it was not for me. I set up a blogger account to co-write a webzine type of blog for young women: cameratismo. Too bad everyone's lives got super busy and we hardly posted after it got started up. My first post for my blog was on September 13 2009. It was lyrics from a song I was obsessed with at the time. (It's still a really really good song.) But within a few months, I was . . . hooked. Though yes, I admit, I freaked when, at around 12 followers, a linkless follower clicked that f-button. For a while I was wondering if I should go private, if there were creepers out there reading my stuff. I've since gotten over that. I questioned a blogger friend up and down about her take on it all, and I felt safe with the advice she gave. Ha. I've posted recipes, paintings I've done, days that were beautiful, and random scenes and stuff that struck me as funny...such as some of the ones with the label siblings. ;)
The kind of blogs I read varies . . . Mainly, blogs that post things that I'm interested in, or blogs that are written by friends, and thus, I enjoy reading them no matter what. So. If I comprised a short list of subjects of blogs I follow? It would be mommy blogs, foodie blogs, military blogs, photography blogs, traveling/European blogs, decorating blogs, and you all know those just plain old freaking creative blogs.
The top things that attract me to the blogs I read are: The aesthetics of the site. Relatively clean, unjumbled (yes, I just made that word up ;), organized, purposeful, and, to an extent, carrying the taste and personality of the author. --Still talking about the look of the blog, not yet the actual content.
And if it's only one or two of the above characteristics mentioned, and I follow it, you know I find the writing worth it all. I'm a person who prefers space to think and read the blog, not be cloistered.
*laughs at self*
I love it when I find a blog where the writer, whether practiced or not, just says it as it is. Whether they're poetic, blunt, or just everyday, they're usually one or two of those together. Heck, you might run into a really wonderful blog where the author happens to (subconsciously) be all three.
Photos attract me. Food attracts me. Beautiful people do, too. Writing, most of all, has attracted me.
People have diverse ways of saying things. They have different --or completely mirrored-- thoughts about the same general subject, and yet their heart can come through in the writing, and the shades and tints of speech and phrases are different . . . and that's what makes it lovely.
I love that there are different styles, different feels to the text and emotion that is published. Yeah, I was kind of obsessed with the word different.
This was a pointed post, and my normal blog posts have the tendency to be quite random. And sometimes amusing. So, there you have it: some of the whys and hows of my blogging experience thus far.
4.06.2011
Reintegration With Wife on the Roller Coaster
Lovelies! Here we are again with another fabulous line up of guest bloggers to entertain you all while I am busy cleaning our new house from top to bottom, grocery shopping, and all of the ever-important mani/pedi, spray tan, waxing, and hair appointments in preparation for the big HOMECOMING!! I am so glad I have all of these wonderful Lovelies stepping in for me so I can focus on the important things not to mention so I can be sure to take breathers in between my anxiety attacks. So please be sure to show all of my wonderful Lovelies lots of love because they deserve it. Today we have celebrity status Wife from Riding the Roller Coaster. If you haven't heard of her and you are in the Milie world, I consider you crazy or living under an internet rock. She is one of my favorite bloggers of all time, a phenomenal writer, and a great friend.
Thank you so much Mrs. S for having me as a guest again!
We all know that sending our husbands off on a deployment is a huge adjustment. And most of us have learned that homecomings also involve a unique set of adaptations. Well it seems I have a knack for making those reintegration readjustments even more complicated by throwing my own personal life changes into the mix.
When my husband returned from his first deployment, my visions of romantic first kisses, cheek-numbing smiles, joy-filled tears, rib-breaking hugs, and repeated I love you’s all came true. As we cuddled in bed together that first night, I truly believed that everything would magically fall back into place and we’d pick up where we left off 6 months earlier. And I was crushed when that didn’t happen.
I kept telling myself that my husband wasn’t the same person he was when he left, that I didn’t know how to talk to him anymore. But somewhere along the line I realized that I wasn’t the same person either, that maybe he didn’t know how to talk to me. When the deployment started, I was a naïve new mom of a 6-month-old. I had just started my student teaching, only a semester away from graduating with my master’s degree. But by the time the deployment ended, my graduation had come and gone, and I was a stay-at-home mom with little adult interaction or intellectual stimulation. I was still trying
to adjust to my transition from full-time student to full-time Domestic Engineer when I suddenly had to learn how to be a full-time wife again. My life had completely changed since the last time I saw my husband.
Flash forward 6 years later to another deployment. This time around we were older and wiser. We both knew what to anticipate before, during, and after the deployment, and I dialed down my homecoming expectations. But I realized that once again, I was coping with another major transition in my own life that coincided with Mr. Roller Coaster’s reintegration. The first time around I was transitioning from student to full-time mom. This time, I was transitioning from full-time mom to working mom.
In a way, the timing couldn’t have been worse. I mean, this was a major lifestyle change for me, and I was doing it in the midst of reintegration when everyone was trying to figure out life as a family again. How was I supposed to reconnect with my husband when I was going through my own identity crisis? How would he feel returning to a wife who suddenly had a different schedule and different priorities than what he was used to?
But in a way, the timing was perfect. We had to get to know each other again anyway. Why not start the introductions with the new me? And I felt that being honest and opening up to Mr. Roller Coaster about my fears and anxieties toward joining the working world again helped to open up the lines of communication that had grown a little rusty during the deployment. Sometimes all you need is a simple conversation starter, and once the words start flowing, they take on a life of their own.
Readjusting to life after a deployment is always a bit tricky, regardless of whatever else may be going on in your life. Men and women have to learn how to be man and wife again after months of living apart. But with a little bit of time, a little bit of patience, and whole lot of humor, normal life does resume. And in the meantime, you get to fall in love with each other all over again.
Now I wonder what my next major life change will for the next deployment. Maybe best-selling author? (Hey a girl can dream right?)
Thank you so much Mrs. S for having me as a guest again!
Reintegrating Roller Coaster Style
We all know that sending our husbands off on a deployment is a huge adjustment. And most of us have learned that homecomings also involve a unique set of adaptations. Well it seems I have a knack for making those reintegration readjustments even more complicated by throwing my own personal life changes into the mix.
When my husband returned from his first deployment, my visions of romantic first kisses, cheek-numbing smiles, joy-filled tears, rib-breaking hugs, and repeated I love you’s all came true. As we cuddled in bed together that first night, I truly believed that everything would magically fall back into place and we’d pick up where we left off 6 months earlier. And I was crushed when that didn’t happen.
I kept telling myself that my husband wasn’t the same person he was when he left, that I didn’t know how to talk to him anymore. But somewhere along the line I realized that I wasn’t the same person either, that maybe he didn’t know how to talk to me. When the deployment started, I was a naïve new mom of a 6-month-old. I had just started my student teaching, only a semester away from graduating with my master’s degree. But by the time the deployment ended, my graduation had come and gone, and I was a stay-at-home mom with little adult interaction or intellectual stimulation. I was still trying
to adjust to my transition from full-time student to full-time Domestic Engineer when I suddenly had to learn how to be a full-time wife again. My life had completely changed since the last time I saw my husband.
Flash forward 6 years later to another deployment. This time around we were older and wiser. We both knew what to anticipate before, during, and after the deployment, and I dialed down my homecoming expectations. But I realized that once again, I was coping with another major transition in my own life that coincided with Mr. Roller Coaster’s reintegration. The first time around I was transitioning from student to full-time mom. This time, I was transitioning from full-time mom to working mom.
In a way, the timing couldn’t have been worse. I mean, this was a major lifestyle change for me, and I was doing it in the midst of reintegration when everyone was trying to figure out life as a family again. How was I supposed to reconnect with my husband when I was going through my own identity crisis? How would he feel returning to a wife who suddenly had a different schedule and different priorities than what he was used to?
But in a way, the timing was perfect. We had to get to know each other again anyway. Why not start the introductions with the new me? And I felt that being honest and opening up to Mr. Roller Coaster about my fears and anxieties toward joining the working world again helped to open up the lines of communication that had grown a little rusty during the deployment. Sometimes all you need is a simple conversation starter, and once the words start flowing, they take on a life of their own.
Readjusting to life after a deployment is always a bit tricky, regardless of whatever else may be going on in your life. Men and women have to learn how to be man and wife again after months of living apart. But with a little bit of time, a little bit of patience, and whole lot of humor, normal life does resume. And in the meantime, you get to fall in love with each other all over again.
Now I wonder what my next major life change will for the next deployment. Maybe best-selling author? (Hey a girl can dream right?)
4.05.2011
Surviving Deployment on an Island With G.I. Joe's Wife
Lovelies! Here we are again with another fabulous line up of guest bloggers to entertain you all while I am busy cleaning our new house from top to bottom, grocery shopping, and all of the ever-important mani/pedi, spray tan, waxing, and hair appointments in preparation for the big HOMECOMING!! I am so glad I have all of these wonderful Lovelies stepping in for me so I can focus on the important things not to mention so I can be sure to take breathers in between my anxiety attacks. So please be sure to show all of my wonderful Lovelies lots of love because they deserve it. Today I have the beautiful Sarah from G.I. Joe's Wife. She and I have a lot in common and I just adore her. Her middle name happens to be my first name, she was born in England, and she lives in Hawaii. She's the bomb diggity so show her some lovin'.
Surviving Deployment on an Island
Just after we arrived in Hawaii last year, we were informed that my husband’s unit was deploying in a few months. Even though we’d heard rumors, the news was still shocking. How can it not be? What hurt me most was that the Army was taking him again. We’d been separated through BCT and most of AIT (which he’d just finished) and yet they were making him deploy for 12 months already...
When he left, I knew a total of 3 people on this island. Two were wives from Joe’s company. One of the company wives is a woman I’ve referred to on my blog as Annoying Wife. After a week I realized that her negativity was influencing me and I stopped responding to her 9 bazillion FB messages and texts. The other I just didn’t know how to contact. So, that left me with one friend on this island - Mrs. C.
Lucky for me, we’d met via email and phone calls before Joe and I even moved to Hawaii. Her hubby (also named Joe) was nice enough to help us out with some issues we were having before we PCSed. Once we got here, they picked us up and showed us around a bit. After my hubby deployed, Mrs. C helped me quite a bit. She came over and helped me make my house look like a home. We unpacked, through things away, hung up pictures and even locked ourselves out of the house. =) She watched me freak out when my Papa was put in the hospital and I didn’t have Joe here to lean on. She’s quite a friend, that one.
My bestie, Melissa, came to visit for my birthday during July. I don’t think I would have survived that week without her. She kept me really busy and having someone else in the house was very comforting. After she left, I suddenly had nothing to do. I had tons of time on my hands and too many thoughts in my head. As many of you Millies know, this is not a good thing!! At that point, I still didn’t have any kind of talking routine with Joe and I was still pretty concerned about Papa.
Before Joe had left, I decided that I’d volunteer on post. The job market here isn’t the greatest and, honestly, I wasn’t really sure I wanted to teach here. Plus, I’d heard they were already downsizing. No point in trying, really. Around the middle of July, I went to ACS. I wanted to help out there, but they were full. I was given a list of places that accepted volunteers. As I looked through it, I realized that there was a museum on post!
In an attempt to stay busy, I did several things: I decided I’d take on volunteering at the museum 3 days a week for 3 hours. It’s not much, but it breaks up the week and gives me something to look forward to. I also joined the spouses’ club on post, thanks to Chantal. Through her, I also met several
other spouses who have become my closest friends here. We don’t spend just a whole lot of time together, but it’s nice to have other people to talk to about deployment... Their husbands are “over there” with mine, just not in the same unit. I wound up becoming the company FRG’s co-leader as well. It wasn’t something I was thrilled about taking on, but it hasn’t been too bad yet. =)
As much as I try to keep myself busy, it’s still very hard being here alone. I have friends, I have “work,” and I have things to do around the house. It’s never the same though. My house is always empty except for the rare occasion when someone graces it with their presence.
The absolute hardest thing about being here is the lack of contact with friends and family back home. Hawaii is in a terrible time zone. Currently, I am 6 hours behind the east coast and 5 behind CT, where our families and friends live. Half a day. When I usually want to call someone, it’s already 8, 9, 10 at night their time. It makes communication really difficult. Plus, there’s the “out of sight out of mind” thing that happens when you don’t live in the circle. This is going to sound bitter, but it’s the truth. I’m often the last person in the family to know anything that’s going on. On my side, it’s because I’m just not there. On Joe’s it’s either because 1) I’m not there or 2) they’ve mentioned it to Joe and he either forgot or hadn’t talked to me in days. It’s hard to take when you’re used to being in the middle of everything.
I often feel very secluded here. In fact, I’m technically stuck on this island. I can’t go for a 3 hour drive and wind up in another state. I can’t pick up and go visit anyone without it costing $1000. Vice versa if someone needed to get to me. I think I would probably feel different about this place if I’d been able to
experience it with my other half. For the most part, I feel trapped and alone. Even if that isn’t the complete truth.
Despite the crapiness of the situation, I feel like I’m pretty well adjusted. I got out on my own and made friends. I started volunteering. I found a church home for us. I turned these white walls into something a little more colorful. I’ve learned my way around, for the most part. Deployment is an odd thing in itself, and it’s different for all of us.
At the end of the 4 to12 month deployments, all milspouses are the same: We just want our husbands safe in our arms, where they belong.
4.01.2011
TTC With The Annoyed Army Wife
Lovelies! Here we are again with another fabulous line up of guest bloggers to entertain you all while I am busy cleaning our new house from top to bottom, grocery shopping, and all of the ever-important mani/pedi, spray tan, waxing, and hair appointments in preparation for the big HOMECOMING!! I am so glad I have all of these wonderful Lovelies stepping in for me so I can focus on the important things not to mention so I can be sure to take breathers in between my anxiety attacks. So please be sure to show all of my wonderful Lovelies lots of love because they deserve it. Today I have the incredibly charming Annoyed Army Wife. She cracks me up and I love her sarcastic, blunt, snarky posts because she's just like me. Michelle just welcomed her own hubby so a big fatty congrats to her too!
I’ve been following Mrs. S. for quite awhile now, I’ve checked out her pages, which I highly recommend you do. One of the first posts I read by Mrs. S. was a guest post she did on Flip Flops & Combat Boots. I cried. I didn’t comment because I was such a newbie blogger at the time, but I sat down and cried for a woman I didn’t even know. I started following Mrs. S's blog that day. I highly recommend you read By November if you haven’t yet.
Some of you may know me as the annoyed army wife. If all goes well I should be reuniting with my deployed husband, OccDoc, right about now. He’s been deployed in Afghanistan working as a battalion surgeon for about 7 months now. I had the great pleasure of meeting Mrs. S. in real life, and we totally bonded over some fabulous cupcakes. Mrs. S. wanted me to write something funny and sarcastic about infertility; I kind of missed the mark, but I hope you enjoy my rant, nonetheless.
OccDoc and I have been trying really, really hard to get pregnant for awhile now. We aren’t one of those couples who are just not not trying, we are actively trying. We hit our one year TTC (Trying to Conceive) anniversary 4 days before he deployed. I was hoping for a miracle and a BFP (big fat positive) after he left, but Aunt Flo arrived and my hopes were dashed. Cue massive amounts of wine drinking and mounds of soggy Kleenexes. We’ve been on a seven month ‘break’ from TTC, um, considering we’re on separate continents. We’re planning to just ‘relax’ for about 3 months once he’s back, then we’ll head off to the doctor for some fertility/infertility workups.
Shortly after we got married (the second time) we told our family and friends we were waiting until OccDoc was out of the Army to have a family, he’s so not a lifer. After crunching some numbers and realizing we weren’t getting any younger (who knew?) we decided to start actively trying after I graduated from massage school. Girls at my school were getting knocked up right and left, so I assumed we’d have no problem. Yeah, you know what happens when you assume.
Here we are 18 months later and our stupid home office is still just a stupid home office instead of a nursery. Hopefully by the time this post goes live I will have reunited with OccDoc and we’ll be busy gettin’ busy, if you know what I mean. Ha ha! Of course TTC always makes hearing the news that a friend, a family member, another blogger, or some random drug addict on the street is pregnant pretty hard to take. I want to be happy for them, and I genuinely am happy for them, but at the same time I wonder why they got to be so lucky and I’m just getting screwed (pun intended). I read on a blog one time that I shouldn’t be upset when I hear the “So and So’s Pregnant!” news because that ‘pregnant woman didn’t take the last baby off the shelf,’ but it still stings. Even though I smile and say ‘Congrats’ I’m crying on the inside.
One of the hidden treasures of this deployment is that people have finally stopped asking if OccDoc and I are trying to have a baby. Could you please twist the knife a bit more with your questions? Do you know how much that questions rips through the heart and soul of someone TTC? Do you know how much someone TTC wants to bitchslap you when you tell them to ‘relax’? I’m a massage therapist who meditates twice a day and gets weekly massage for crap’s sake, you can’t get much more relaxed than that. So, Eff Off and YOU go relax. I hope you all have a lovely day, and I thank Mrs. S. for hosting me today, now I’ve gotta run and see if I’m ovulating…
3.31.2011
Loving Paint With Grand Design
Lovelies! Here we are again with another fabulous line up of guest bloggers to entertain you all while I am busy cleaning our new house from top to bottom, grocery shopping, and all of the ever-important mani/pedi, spray tan, waxing, and hair appointments in preparation for the big HOMECOMING!! I am so glad I have all of these wonderful Lovelies stepping in for me so I can focus on the important things not to mention so I can be sure to take breathers in between my anxiety attacks. So please be sure to show all of my wonderful Lovelies lots of love because they deserve it. Today, I can't even tell you how stoked I am to have Nikki here. She's the BFF Forever I've mentioned before that I met while in Arizona. Her hubby is an officer in the Army National Guard who finished his first year tour in Iraq flying Black Hawks late last year. I also want to give a big fatty shout out to her hubby because he just got an incredible new position as a flight instructor!! She's a bagenius and an incredibly talented designer. Here's her take on making houses into homes when you move a lot. I also included pics of her own gorgeous house and be sure to check out her design blog. All of her projects are incredible.
I was completely stoked when my husband and I got the call that he had orders to go to flight school. I was so tired of Arizona and the stupid desert and wanted a new adventure. Not to mention I romanticized the South after watching movies like Gone with the Wind, The Notebook, and Sweet Home Alabama. So I loaded up all our stuff, my husband flew home from BOLC and two days later we were on our way to Fort Rucker.
When we got there I was in awe. Imagine my surprise to learn that grass, trees, and flowers could grow in the wild without constant drip lines! There was water everywhere we looked (although some of the lakes on post were inhabited by crocs and the like) and amazing historic homes. I loved to drive down main street in Ozark looking at old houses and fantasize about owning one of my own.
But that isn't where we lived. We lived in a house built some time in the 50's that was infested with mold and other critters (Alabama lingo for bugs). Animal control actually called themselves the "critter gitters". And even though the house was ugly as sin, smelled questionable, and made everything I hung on the walls look crooked, I LOVED it because for the first time in my life, I had a home that I could make look any way I wanted. With paint. And boy did I paint. I painted every wall in that place.
I suppose that's where I developed my love for paint. Because it took my house on post from ridiculously hideous to a place I wanted to show off. Now that we have settled down and bought a house of our own, I have enjoyed painting the walls of my new house just as much as I did then. Its one of those things I don't think I'll ever get sick of. Being able to paint makes something gnarly into something beautiful and helps make a house into a home. Even though my husband isn't active duty, we have moved quite a bit and I'm one of those people who gets stir crazy after 2 years. Paint is one of those things that makes transitioning easier and I'm not going to complain about having a fresh canvas when we do move. Decorating a blank slate of a house is the best part about moving.
(Ingeniously painted wall. She used flat pain, a stencil, and clear acrylic spray paint.)
((Her fabulous master bedroom)
(The baby's nursery/office/craft room.)
(Her little girl's room. Best princess, girly room ever!)
You can tour her entire fabulous house HERE
3.30.2011
Homecoming Jitters With ACE
Lovelies! Here we are again with another fabulous line up of guest bloggers to entertain you all while I am busy cleaning our new house from top to bottom, grocery shopping, and all of the ever-important mani/pedi, spray tan, waxing, and hair appointments in preparation for the big HOMECOMING!! I am so glad I have all of these wonderful Lovelies stepping in for me so I can focus on the important things not to mention so I can be sure to take breathers in between my anxiety attacks. So please be sure to show all of my wonderful Lovelies lots of love because they deserve it. I am so happy today's blogger is here once again. I love this girl! She is one of the very first people who I started reading and who started following me. Its the gorgeous ACE from The Flightline Life. Yay! She's been through quite a few deployments and homecomings with her husband in the last couple years so what better person to host while I'm preparing for my first right? Thanks ACE!
You can’t eat, can’t sleep, you have to pee every five minutes, can’t sit still, and are constantly cursing the clock for not ticking fast enough. What’s got your nerves in a bunch? Homecoming! It’s finally that time. Months ago you thought it would take forever to see him again. Touch him, smell him, wrap your arms around him. About a month ago you were probably mad at the world. You were so close to the end and now time was dragging. Now you’re moments away. Just moments and time seems to have frozen as if to make your suffering worse.
I feel the same way every time on homecoming day/night. It doesn’t matter how long he’s been gone for, how many we’ve been through, I always feel the same. Anxious and like I am going to puke or piss myself out of sheer excitement.
Our first deployment we were “engaged” and I couldn’t pick him up. Why? It was my senior sendoff ceremony for my sorority. I had my arm in a brace because I had just found out I have carpal tunnel. I sat at our state wide celebration knowing I was 15 minutes away from my apartment where he was and wanting to die on the inside. I stayed as long as I could handle it and jetted off campus and probably broke a ton of driving laws. I remember hitting every light and nearly crying from excitement. Would he still think I was beautiful? Would he want to kiss me? Will I still feel the same when I see him? Does he look any different? What if he thinks my outfit is stupid? All these immature thoughts crossed my mind. We’d been apart for 4.5 months and only together for 8. What if it wasn’t the same?
The moment that door opened and he wrapped his arms around me, all my insecurities, worries vanished. I felt whole again. Complete. It was the most amazing feeling in my life.
I remember all three of my homecomings vividly. But I only have pictures of my last. This past one, I remember laughing so much because I was nervous and being insanely loud on the flight line. The plane had landed and was taking forever to unload. We waited, waited, and waited for what seemed like hours but was probably only 30 minutes or so. I wanted to just run out there to the huge plane, but I knew that was not a good idea. I felt as though the group of them were walking so slowly towards us.
There they were! So close, but still too far for me to run. Then I saw him break away from the group and move towards me and I ran.
I remember he lifted me off the ground and carried me back to where I was allowed to be. I remember sobbing, sobbing so hard and telling him “Don’t let go yet” He was laughing his amazing laugh.
Finally he set me down and I could let go of him. I couldn’t believe it. Each time I feel as though it can’t get any better but it does. Each time is just like the last. Amazing. All my worries about what it will be like fades away.
I know Mrs. S. would like some advice, and instead of giving the advice of “don’t plan anything, take it one day at a time, etc” (because I know you’ve read all that already and probably numerous times over), I want you to let the world fade away to where it is just you and him. The two of you. Let the noise disappear, the people fade, and just be with him. Hold him as long as you need to. Kiss him as long as you want, grab onto those ABUs and don’t let go if you don’t want to. Because eventually you have to come back to reality and nothing, ever compares to those first few moments when you are back in the love of your life’s arms again. Nothing.
Happy Homecoming Beautiful!
You can’t eat, can’t sleep, you have to pee every five minutes, can’t sit still, and are constantly cursing the clock for not ticking fast enough. What’s got your nerves in a bunch? Homecoming! It’s finally that time. Months ago you thought it would take forever to see him again. Touch him, smell him, wrap your arms around him. About a month ago you were probably mad at the world. You were so close to the end and now time was dragging. Now you’re moments away. Just moments and time seems to have frozen as if to make your suffering worse.
I feel the same way every time on homecoming day/night. It doesn’t matter how long he’s been gone for, how many we’ve been through, I always feel the same. Anxious and like I am going to puke or piss myself out of sheer excitement.
Our first deployment we were “engaged” and I couldn’t pick him up. Why? It was my senior sendoff ceremony for my sorority. I had my arm in a brace because I had just found out I have carpal tunnel. I sat at our state wide celebration knowing I was 15 minutes away from my apartment where he was and wanting to die on the inside. I stayed as long as I could handle it and jetted off campus and probably broke a ton of driving laws. I remember hitting every light and nearly crying from excitement. Would he still think I was beautiful? Would he want to kiss me? Will I still feel the same when I see him? Does he look any different? What if he thinks my outfit is stupid? All these immature thoughts crossed my mind. We’d been apart for 4.5 months and only together for 8. What if it wasn’t the same?
The moment that door opened and he wrapped his arms around me, all my insecurities, worries vanished. I felt whole again. Complete. It was the most amazing feeling in my life.
I remember all three of my homecomings vividly. But I only have pictures of my last. This past one, I remember laughing so much because I was nervous and being insanely loud on the flight line. The plane had landed and was taking forever to unload. We waited, waited, and waited for what seemed like hours but was probably only 30 minutes or so. I wanted to just run out there to the huge plane, but I knew that was not a good idea. I felt as though the group of them were walking so slowly towards us.
There they were! So close, but still too far for me to run. Then I saw him break away from the group and move towards me and I ran.
I remember he lifted me off the ground and carried me back to where I was allowed to be. I remember sobbing, sobbing so hard and telling him “Don’t let go yet” He was laughing his amazing laugh.
Finally he set me down and I could let go of him. I couldn’t believe it. Each time I feel as though it can’t get any better but it does. Each time is just like the last. Amazing. All my worries about what it will be like fades away.
I know Mrs. S. would like some advice, and instead of giving the advice of “don’t plan anything, take it one day at a time, etc” (because I know you’ve read all that already and probably numerous times over), I want you to let the world fade away to where it is just you and him. The two of you. Let the noise disappear, the people fade, and just be with him. Hold him as long as you need to. Kiss him as long as you want, grab onto those ABUs and don’t let go if you don’t want to. Because eventually you have to come back to reality and nothing, ever compares to those first few moments when you are back in the love of your life’s arms again. Nothing.
Happy Homecoming Beautiful!
3.29.2011
Not Out of The Woods.... Yet With We See The Same Stars
Lovelies! Here we are again with another fabulous line up of guest bloggers to entertain you all while I am busy cleaning our new house from top to bottom, grocery shopping, and all of the ever-important mani/pedi, spray tan, waxing, and hair appointments in preparation for the big HOMECOMING!! I am so glad I have all of these wonderful Lovelies stepping in for me so I can focus on the important things not to mention so I can be sure to take breathers in between my anxiety attacks. So please be sure to show all of my wonderful Lovelies lots of love because they deserve it. Today I have the beautiful Carmen from We See The Same Stars. She is such a good friend and I am truly blessed to have her in my life and on the blog sharing her wisdom. Thanks doll!
It just goes to show that no matter how much experience you have with the military they always manage to keep you on your toes. Not to scare anyone, but an EAS date, I learned, doesn't mean all clear until the date he signs his release. Hopefully we have no more surprises!
First, I want to thank Mrs. S. for letting me guest post (once again) while she is off anxiously awaiting her homecoming! I'm so proud of you girl, you did it!
Lately on a lot of my guest blogs I have been talking about EAS (can you tell it's been on my mind lately?) However, Mrs. S. asked me personally to write about my most recent experience with the military.
Here is some background info, my husband's EAS (end of active service) is coming up in May and so when I rung in 2011, I was certain the Marine Corps couldn't possibly do anything or mess anything up right? Oh Carmen, you should have known better than that.
I had gone to pick up my mama from work with my brother and one of her friends needed a ride home so naturally, I obliged. We were on the high way driving to her friends house after I dropped my brother off at the bar. My husband called me and I immediately told him I would call him when I got home (thinking he just wanted to chat) but no less than 5 minutes later I receive a text from him saying:
"We need to talk, it is extremely important."
That could have meant a multitude of things, but it wasn't just "anything" compared to what I was about to hear. So I dropped her friend off and waited until it was just me and my mama so then I called him. He said he had bad news (at this point, I'm thinking someone died) and he told me that hew as being sent to Afghanistan due to an emergency in his unit. My heart stopped and dropped into my butt while my stomach rose up into my chest and throat. I felt like throwing up, crying, punching the wall, and just all other mixes of emotions. I immediately started tearing up but didn't want to break down and cry while still driving.
As soon as I got home I told the news to my family. My mama thought I was joking and my sister's jaw dropped to the floor. They were in as much disbelief as I was. I didn't want any support at the time but I called my best friend and my husband as I cried my heart out to them. Then when I finally emerged and saw my family, they embraced me and I bawled my eyes out int their arms. I'm lucky to have them in my life. :)
My husband left the next morning and I just felt so empty inside (yes, he was given less than 24 hour notice). Nothing can compare to that feeling. He called me when he got there and was probably going to stay throughout the rest of his enlistment (which was still 3 months then).
"NOOOOOOO!!!!! I had a surprise trip planned to visit you next month! Come home sooner!! I need to see you!!"
He just laughed and told me how cute I was for wanting to surprise him. He said he would do his best to get home before I got there. I was super paranoid he would not make it home in time. He came home 10 days later and I will be seeing him this coming Saturday :)
3.02.2011
Top Ten With Annoyed Army Wife
Hey there Lovelies! I am missing from the bloggy world for a bit as I travel from Arizona back to Georgia and embark on an internetless journey of finding a house and turning it into a home before Mr. Superman arrives home. Until then, enjoy all of my Lovelies who will be entertaining you and be sure to show them a lot of love! I have the fantastically snarky and witty Annoyed Army Wife today. I love her blog and love that she's a real life Blog Lovely friend. Go ch-ch-check her out! Plus, yesterday I happened to be a guest for HER because she is off picking up her loverface OccDoc!
I am uber-pleased to be guesting for Mrs. S. today. I can normally be found at the annoyed army wife. For the past 7ish months I've been supporting my darling husband, OccDoc, on his first deployment to Afghanistan as a battalion surgeon. Here is a snippet of what I learned while he was gone.
9. Movies are not as funny when there isn't someone on the couch to laugh at the funny parts with you.
8. Flannel sheets aren't as warm and cozy when you don't have your husband's thighs to put your cold feet on.
7. It doesn't matter if there is another person present, I will have a conversation with my dogs, or my rabbits if I'm really desperate. I have a need to incessantly talk to some one, even if they don't know what I'm saying.
6. Apparently OccDoc is not the one who forgets to put a new roll of toilet paper in the bathroom when the current one runs out. That lesson sucks big time every time I had to learn it while he was deployed.
5. My car does not need to be washed every week, that's a waste of money. That money could be spent on shoes.
4. If you are 5 foot 3 inches, the entire contents of the all top shelves of your cabinets will live on the countertop while your marginally taller husband is deployed. I'm too lazy to be climbing all over the counter every time I needed the kosher salt or the grilled cheese sandwich maker.
3. Pillows can retain your husband's scent and will release that scent when you least expect it. Keep Kleenex by the bedside for these times.
2. I spill a lot of coffee in the morning. OccDoc always cleans it up before I realize I spilt it. He's always doing stuff like cleaning up my little messes before I notice them. After seven months you will notice 'little' messes.
1. I can make it through a deployment and be just fine, but that doesn't mean when he comes back I can't exaggerate a bit and guilt my husband into buying me more presents and doting on me a bit more this year. Just sayin', you've got to have a plan, people. I'm just kidding, I won't guilt my husband into too much, maybe just a few pairs of shoes...
I am uber-pleased to be guesting for Mrs. S. today. I can normally be found at the annoyed army wife. For the past 7ish months I've been supporting my darling husband, OccDoc, on his first deployment to Afghanistan as a battalion surgeon. Here is a snippet of what I learned while he was gone.
Top Ten Things I Have Learned While My Husband Was Deployed
10. OccDoc, my husband, cleans up dog shit in the yard and doesn't tell me about it. He's been gone for 7 months, and I have never ever seen so much Chihuahua crap in the yard. I am planning to clean it up in the next couple of days and expect to be rewarded a medal for my valor.
9. Movies are not as funny when there isn't someone on the couch to laugh at the funny parts with you.
8. Flannel sheets aren't as warm and cozy when you don't have your husband's thighs to put your cold feet on.
7. It doesn't matter if there is another person present, I will have a conversation with my dogs, or my rabbits if I'm really desperate. I have a need to incessantly talk to some one, even if they don't know what I'm saying.
6. Apparently OccDoc is not the one who forgets to put a new roll of toilet paper in the bathroom when the current one runs out. That lesson sucks big time every time I had to learn it while he was deployed.
5. My car does not need to be washed every week, that's a waste of money. That money could be spent on shoes.
4. If you are 5 foot 3 inches, the entire contents of the all top shelves of your cabinets will live on the countertop while your marginally taller husband is deployed. I'm too lazy to be climbing all over the counter every time I needed the kosher salt or the grilled cheese sandwich maker.
3. Pillows can retain your husband's scent and will release that scent when you least expect it. Keep Kleenex by the bedside for these times.
2. I spill a lot of coffee in the morning. OccDoc always cleans it up before I realize I spilt it. He's always doing stuff like cleaning up my little messes before I notice them. After seven months you will notice 'little' messes.
1. I can make it through a deployment and be just fine, but that doesn't mean when he comes back I can't exaggerate a bit and guilt my husband into buying me more presents and doting on me a bit more this year. Just sayin', you've got to have a plan, people. I'm just kidding, I won't guilt my husband into too much, maybe just a few pairs of shoes...
2.28.2011
Childhood Dreams with Goodnight Moon
Hey there Lovelies! I am missing from the bloggy world for a bit as I travel from Arizona back to Georgia and embark on an internetless journey of finding a house and turning it into a home before Mr. Superman arrives home. Until then, enjoy all of my Lovelies who will be entertaining you and be sure to show them a lot of love! Yeaaaah! As we start this second week of Guest Blogging Lovelies, I want to give a huge shout out to everyone thus far and an even bigger one to today's guest. Yes, the rumors are true, I am indeed hosting Amber from Goodnight Moon. Gah! Its okay, scream it out. Its okay to be excited. Be sure to go blog stalk her and maybe some of her awesomeness will rub off on you :)
Do you remember when you were growing up
and
you were asked the question
"What do you want to be when you grow up"?
What was your answer?
I changed my mind a few times.
I wanted to be
a teacher
a florist
a nurse
a nun.
Yes...
I said nun.
Now that I'm an adult
and
have been an adult for some time now
I think back on my list
and
realized that I am none of the things I "wanted" to be.
Life happened.
That's a simple statement isn't it?
Life happened.
But it's true.
Sometimes life throws you off the course
you thought you would be on
in life by now.
And thats okay.
I am where I should be
and
for a reason.
I am a
stay at home mommy
to 4 amazing children.
I wouldn't give that up for anything.
Like I tell my kids everyday
"Be your best".
It doesn't matter what job you have in life
just
"be your best".
So it's okay that your not where you thought you would be
right now.
Life happens.
Embrace who you are right now
and
what you are doing.
Make your moments count
and
be happy.
2.25.2011
Living Like A Tourist With No Model Lady
Hey there Lovelies! I am missing from the bloggy world for a bit as I travel from Arizona back to Georgia and embark on an internetless journey of finding a house and turning it into a home before Mr. Superman arrives home. Until then, enjoy all of my Lovelies who will be entertaining you and be sure to show them a lot of love! Today, I have The Lady. Yes, THE Lady. She is freaking awesome and the bomb diggity. To say she's a blogging celebrity would be an understatement. Go join her fan club.
I'm not sure about you, but I am not in love with my current city.
In fact, if Jacksonville, North Carolina was a person I would recommend a good plastic surgeon.
The first business you see when you drive out of the front gate of the base is a strip club.
Not a nice one, either. No professional athletes or politicians here.
If you continue driving you will pass countless car dealerships, fast food joints, sad strip malls, sad strip
clubs and the ever present vultures of desperate service members; military financing and check cashing
establishments.
It's easy to become bored in a place like this and for a long time, I was bored.
It's Saturday night!! What do you want to do? Target, the 2000 square foot mall, or the movies? Maybe
we can head to the corner gas station/McDonalds and meet up with the rest of the street bikers!
Decisions, decisions.
Luckily, while browsing through blogs one day I stumbled upon a post (I don't remember what blog, but
it was rad) in which the author talked about living like a tourist in her own town.
I was intrigued.
So that very weekend we did some research and discovered a farmers market 30 minutes away. We
went and we loved it! We started planning weekend adventures for new places and towns to explore
and after living here for 2 years I actually started to like it.
For 2 years I drove past Goodwill, never once stopping.
It's now my favorite thrifting playground and I have found countless treasures there.
30 minutes away is a restaurant devoted to Marilyn Monroe, Elvis AND Christmas. My trifecta of
happiness and for years I didn't even know it was there!! How lame was I?!?
I know it can seem like you live in the most po-diddly-unk town on the map, but if you're looking for
adventure, you'll always find it.
In fact, if Jacksonville, North Carolina was a person I would recommend a good plastic surgeon.
The first business you see when you drive out of the front gate of the base is a strip club.
Not a nice one, either. No professional athletes or politicians here.
If you continue driving you will pass countless car dealerships, fast food joints, sad strip malls, sad strip
clubs and the ever present vultures of desperate service members; military financing and check cashing
establishments.
It's easy to become bored in a place like this and for a long time, I was bored.
It's Saturday night!! What do you want to do? Target, the 2000 square foot mall, or the movies? Maybe
we can head to the corner gas station/McDonalds and meet up with the rest of the street bikers!
Decisions, decisions.
Luckily, while browsing through blogs one day I stumbled upon a post (I don't remember what blog, but
it was rad) in which the author talked about living like a tourist in her own town.
I was intrigued.
So that very weekend we did some research and discovered a farmers market 30 minutes away. We
went and we loved it! We started planning weekend adventures for new places and towns to explore
and after living here for 2 years I actually started to like it.
For 2 years I drove past Goodwill, never once stopping.
It's now my favorite thrifting playground and I have found countless treasures there.
30 minutes away is a restaurant devoted to Marilyn Monroe, Elvis AND Christmas. My trifecta of
happiness and for years I didn't even know it was there!! How lame was I?!?
I know it can seem like you live in the most po-diddly-unk town on the map, but if you're looking for
adventure, you'll always find it.
2.24.2011
My Husband Gets The Shaft With Right Here, Right Now
Hey there Lovelies! I am missing from the bloggy world for a bit as I travel from Arizona back to Georgia and embark on an internetless journey of finding a house and turning it into a home before Mr. Superman arrives home. Until then, enjoy all of my Lovelies who will be entertaining you and be sure to show them a lot of love! Today I have the Lovely Adrienne. She's a newbie follower and jumped at the opportunity to blog for me which mad me SO happy. She's seriously cute and has some quick wit. Be sure to go check her out!
I can tell you though, that I am SO thankful to have him as my hubby!
He treats me so well. I mean, he married me... Got me with him to Korea, got me a Wii, and now, we're getting to move to Germany. I will admit it, I AM SPOILED by him!! And me? I do my best...ish... It's TIRING keeping up with the... internet and then trying to keep up with the house too! It's pretty tough cooking meals everyday! I barely cooked anything that wasn't out-of-the-box (aka Mac n cheese... Hamburger helper... etc). Though... I am learning, slowly. How on earth do you make it a daily thing? I don't have kids (thank goodness, I really don't know what I would do then!), that would make this a million times harder!
Husband works so hard, and then he comes home to... me... Sometimes I am showered, sometimes I get the dishes done, and clean the house. But it's rare that I have everything pristine by the time he gets home. Which makes me think that sometimes he could be thinking to himself "What on earth has my wife DONE all day?!". But I like to think that he doesn't think that.
What do you do all day? How on earth to you keep the motivation to keep the house clean all the time?
First off, let me just introduce myself! I am Adrienne from Right Here, Right Now!
So there we are! Yeah, that's my Army Husband in the picture! He and I have been married since Sept. of 2010! Can you believe it? Already over 6 months of marriage... Time sure does fly... Sometimes though... I feel that my husband is getting the shaft... From me (not in the gross way or anything...Get your head out of the gutter! Jebus...). I am just this 23 year old girl who he decided to marry. I am sure he has his reasons, but... He is 30! He picked this little young thing, who doesn't know too much about life... and has yet to experience many of the things that he has already experienced! Basically... What I am saying is that I am young compared to him! I don't know what I am doing!
I can tell you though, that I am SO thankful to have him as my hubby!
He treats me so well. I mean, he married me... Got me with him to Korea, got me a Wii, and now, we're getting to move to Germany. I will admit it, I AM SPOILED by him!! And me? I do my best...ish... It's TIRING keeping up with the... internet and then trying to keep up with the house too! It's pretty tough cooking meals everyday! I barely cooked anything that wasn't out-of-the-box (aka Mac n cheese... Hamburger helper... etc). Though... I am learning, slowly. How on earth do you make it a daily thing? I don't have kids (thank goodness, I really don't know what I would do then!), that would make this a million times harder!
Husband works so hard, and then he comes home to... me... Sometimes I am showered, sometimes I get the dishes done, and clean the house. But it's rare that I have everything pristine by the time he gets home. Which makes me think that sometimes he could be thinking to himself "What on earth has my wife DONE all day?!". But I like to think that he doesn't think that.
What do you do all day? How on earth to you keep the motivation to keep the house clean all the time?
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