12.09.2010

I'm A Woman. Go Figure.

Along with ta-ta's and lady bits, being a woman comes with a few other accessories. Well, usually.

For me, these include crying at the slightest thing gone wrong, crying at anything that reminds me of Mr. Superman, and... oh yeah, crying at just about anything else. I posted this to Mr. Superman a few days ago after returning to Arizona from my two week trip in Utah.

"Soooo, as I was going through security today before my flight, I saw a flash of digital camo. I looked up and my heart stuttered because it was an A1C fully decked out. He was right behind me and he probably thought I was a freak because I could not, for the life of me, stop staring. Cue the tears right? Throw in that line from your email about not caring the next time you fly for 18 hours because it'll mean you're coming home to me and then mix it with my quick mental math and the realization we are barely a third of the way done and I was bawling like a baby. In public. Thank God for waterproof mascara.  

Love you baby."

I will mention that I left out all the other incidents of waterworks that day. 

When I was asked why I was traveling alone, they brimmed over in about 2.5 seconds. 

When I was complimented on my ring and asked where my "lovely husband" was, my voice actually shook and clearing my throat did not convince that old lady it was because I had a cold. 

Oh, how about as we were in the air, when I started thinking about the last time I was on a plane from Utah to Arizona, it was with Mr. Superman by my side. He was rubbing my back, convincing me to not puke because it would be horribly embarrassing and make the plane smell funky. I actually was sniffling for 5 minutes before the terrified 19 year old kid next to me asked if I was okay. 


Dear Deployment, 


You are making me even more erratically emotional and its truly startin' to bug. 

xoxo

30 comments:

Mrs. Muffins said...

:( hugs.

addicted2shius said...

I'm sorry love!!! I wish there was more I could do for you. Air hugs :)

kelsey lauren said...

that ALWAYS happens to me at airports. especially whenever i'm catching a flight back home and away from him. camo and uniforms everywhere. and tears. i totally get it and i know the heartache that comes with every little reminder of him. hang in there girl! our deployment is coming up reallllllly soon, so i'll be here braving it with you. then we can get out "deployment survivor" badges fro our blogs and be proud!

AbbeyG said...

Aww girl... I remember having days like this.. And I really did not understand it at all until I became a milspouse.. Here's giving you LOTs of hugs!! Hang in there!

Radiant Readhead said...

Oh I remember those days!! Every time i would see ACUs, soldiers, ANYTHING military, I would tear up. then I joined, and everytime I saw a CPT, my heart would flutter, and I would have his unexplainable feeling of wanting to go up and hug them...NOT necessarily a good thing to do when you are a PFC in basic training, so i refrained:-) lol. I hope the next 2/3 goe REALLY fast!
hugs!

The WholeFamDamily said...

wait til you have kids and they point at another military guy in his blues or flight suit and say "Daddy"! and you have to kindly tell them, no honey, that's not daddy... AHH ok let's all cry now. you can do it girlie, we've all been there, it would be MORE sad if you never shed a tear, wouldn't it? hang in there chica!

Melanie said...

Hello, I completely understand you right now!!!! By reading your pervious post, I thought, "WOW, she is doing wonderful with her husbands deployment." I was beginning to think that I was a bit of a psycho for crying even at the thought of my Airman leaving. Now he is on his way to Italy, without me. I've been non-stop crying and I'm glad to know that I'm not alone. :) Hope you feel better! It is definitely not an easy job!

Katie said...

Two words. Love.You.

Steph said...

Awww... hang in there! It will be over before you know it.

Jen said...

Big hugs to you!!

annoyed army wife said...

That super sucks. I'm sorry to hear about this. I've been a total crier, too. I try to get it out at home, but those damn tears just sneak up on me!

chambanachik said...

:( Ugh. All I can say is I'll be bawling at an airport soon too.

SHILLIG4FAMILY said...

Oh dear. Gotta love those emotions. I'll remember to get waterproof mascara when Jake leaves next time.

SHILLIG4FAMILY said...

Oh dear. Gotta love those emotions. I'll remember to get waterproof mascara when Jake leaves next time.

Chantal said...

I get a bit emotional sometimes, but especially in the beginning! Now when I see a happy couple holding hands or kissing it wrenches my heart.

Jessica said...

I'm a cryer by nature anyway, so my husband always makes fun of me for crying.

With that being said, this deployment has made me into a total crybaby. Commercials on television, pictures on the internet, talking to people about him, it all turns the waterworks on.

Keep your head up! I'm not saying it's going to get easier, but you will be stronger in the end!!

Random Musings Of My Life said...

Ugg I am going through some of this too... Not that the husband has Cancer I keep seeing it and hearing about it EVERYWHERE. When people ask me "Hows your hubby" I lose it..

Lindsey and Co said...

It gets easier!! I promise!!!

nicole said...

I'm right there with you girl! whew this post gave me a little lump in my throat. My hubby is deployed too right now, comforting to read about others in my same shoes.
Thinking of you today!

Beka said...

:(
hugs!

Wife on the Roller Coaster said...

You're on that emotional roller coaster girl. Hang in there...the ride will smooth out soon.

Lots of hugs and smiles your way my friend.

Mrs. K said...

There's something about a solo plane ride that just reminds you all over on a deployment. I'm sorry, Mrs. S!

AF Recruiters Wife said...

sorry friend... they always brought the waterworks on with me too...

Brie said...

I always feel bad as a milspouse not having gone through a deployment yet when my heart is aching for you and I can't sit here and say "Oh yeah, I've been there" and offer you words to help you through it.

So. All I can do is say I love you. And I'm an emotional wreck on the daily, so if you need a friend. Here are some arms to start with a hug. *Hug*

McDancer said...

For some reason airports always made it worse for me during deployment.
If it makes you feel better, you are definitely not alone in the waterworks department. *hug*

BryceandWhit said...

Oh honey I know exactly what your going threw. Deployements suck and you feel like a complete loser cause if anything reminds you of your hubby you start crying. I dont even feel human anymore! HUGS

BryceandWhit said...

Oh honey I know exactly what your going threw. Deployements suck and you feel like a complete loser cause if anything reminds you of your hubby you start crying. I dont even feel human anymore! HUGS

BryceandWhit said...

Oh honey I know exactly what your going threw. Deployements suck and you feel like a complete loser cause if anything reminds you of your hubby you start crying. I dont even feel human anymore! HUGS

Whitney said...

i'm so sorry girl.. hang in there!

Sasha said...

For real! Why do us women have to be cursed with all this emotion!
I'm so sorry though :( I really hope thing get better