I have been trying to mull this over for a while now. When I am irritated, tact and grace hardly ever come through my words and to say I'm irritated would be a gross minimization of what I'm feeling. If you follow me on Twitter or Facebook you may have seen me post this article that was published on Examiner.com and written by a military wife. You could have seen it posted by someone else you know as well because I alone had 15 fellow Milie's share it along with their disgust with this woman. What's so wrong with the article? Why am I so fired up?
I am all for freedom of speech and freedom of press, I am. This woman has every right to say what she wants but when she is sitting there blatantly attacking an entire community (and one I am proudly a part of) and is spouting off her negativity for anyone to see or read, you'd better believe I am going to get angry and speak my mind. Even more so when I know that everything that person is saying is false. Grossly over-stated.
We as a military spouse community try so hard to fight against the stereotypes we are ignorantly labeled with and then here is a wife doing nothing to help. I just had to respond.
"After I read your article, I was more in shock than anything else so I had to go take a peek at the woman behind the words.
'Debi Ketner, an award-winning military life columnist, has focused on military marriage as a writer in Norfolk for over 14 years. Married to a Navy senior chief, she's also the mother of five sons, one currently on active duty in the Armed Forces. Her articles on military marriage have been featured in Military Times and military websites in the past.'
All I can say is that I feel so sorry for you if you truly believe everything you wrote describing us fellow military wives. It is such a mound of negativity and then reading that you are described as 'an award-winning writer' who has been featured several times in many different online outlets expanded my worries even more to think about the amount of new military spouses and civilians you now have convinced of what you see as the truth. The majority of military spouses I know and have come in contact with, along with myself, try so very hard to dispel the common misconceptions and stereotypes that are widely believed and readily accepted about us all. For a fellow military wife to blatantly spout off negative rhetoric as if its factual is offensive and disappointing but even more so since you are in a position of power to get your ideas published and spread.
I can only hope that someday soon you are able to let go of whatever negative experiences you may have had in the past that poisoned your perception of military wives and the relationships we have with one another. Maybe you'll get lucky and you'll find a hell of a friend in a military spouse because I myself, have found some of the best friends in the world in the 2 years I've been able to call myself a military wife."
This is also the woman that published that article saying that a "vast amount of military couples partook in oral-sex pacts" with other couples while spouses were deployed. Yeah, that's her. I just honestly cannot understand what would make someone do that. She isn't making herself look any better, that's for sure. Thankfully, the majority of feedback she has received has been from fellow military spouses not holding back. I just hope this opens her eyes but I have a feeling she is loving all of the attention and will continue to pollute the internet with her negativity.