"How much can be learned in five years of marriage? I like to think these early years are when all the kinks get worked out and someday it will just be eternal bliss. Since my husband and I are celebrating our five year anniversary this winter, I thought I would compile a list of things I’ve learned since becoming his bride.
* Say “I love you.”
We always make it a point to say “I love you” before we get off the phone, leave the house, or go to bed, no matter how angry or tired we are. It may seem morbid, but you never know if you’ll get to say it again. Sure, I know he loves me and he knows I love him but I’m not sure I could live with myself if there were any other words out of my mouth the last time I got to talk to him.
* If you really want to get closer, take a road trip.
Nothing brings two people closer than a day on the road and not just because of the confined quarters. Two tired people, one person navigating, the other driving… If you can both get out of the car at the end of the trip and be more happy than angry, you’ll know you’re meant to be together. You might want to try this before you get married though… and this test works with friends too, just sayin’.
* Choose your battles.
The toilet seat left up, the dishwasher loaded wrong… I plan on being married for the rest of my life. I don’t want to look back over fifty years or more of marriage and see a bunch of petty fights. That doesn’t mean it never happens but usually if I snap over something like that, there’s a bigger issue going on that needs addressed rather than the empty toilet paper roll, ya know?
* Don’t feel bad if you need a little space.
If you pick one person to be with forever and ever, shouldn’t you be able to spend every waking and sleeping minute together without wanting to spit in their coffee? (I swear I’ve never done that, by the way…) Well, sure, it’s fun at first but it’s human nature for us to have hobbies and interests outside of our spouses. You might just need to get out and go for a run in the morning. Maybe you need a girl’s night once a week, whatever it is, don’t feel bad about it. The happier you both are as individuals, the happier your marriage will be.
* Laugh together.
Not at each other… well, sometimes it’s okay to laugh at each other. Laughter is good for you both physically and mentally so it only makes sense that it’s an important part of a healthy marriage. Do things together that make you laugh like watching a funny movie or fake wrestling around. If you can laugh at the little things in life, the easier it will be to laugh when times get hard- when a good laugh is needed the most.