8.01.2010

My [Proxy] Husband


For those who may have missed my guest post for Mrs. G.I. Joe, here it is. 

I love my man more than anything. I think as a military wife, I have to. I have to have an unbelievably strong love for my Airman. I have always loved him with a love worthy of the eternities but ever since he enlisted and we were thrust into this crazy, hectic, unpredictable life, it feels as if it is even more durable. We can get through anything. Not only can we but we have to. It is a definite necessity. I think most other Millie’s could totally relate.

When Mr. Superman enlisted and we made the decision to jump in headfirst I said, “No matter what, you have to take me home to Arizona because I can NOT be alone without my family and Brighteyes (my Bestie).” He agreed whole-heartedly and was happy to leave me with my more than capable parents, down the road from my sister, and four houses down from Brighteyes. Before he left for BMT, Brighteyes announced that she would be my proxy husband for the next four months and that he had nothing to worry about.

What does a proxy husband do? Well I don’t know about yours (I’m convinced if every Millie doesn’t have one, she needs one!) but I’ll tell you a little about what mine did and continues to do for me even though we are 2,000 miles apart. I met Brighteyes long before I ever even knew Mr. Superman existed. She was with me through my very long awkward adolescence, bad boyfriends, awful tragedies, terrible decisions, and finally “coming back” and straightening up to fly right. She was there through it all. She loved Mr. Superman instantly when he came into my life. She could see he was different and she approved.

When he left for BMT, I was sad. I was lost and lonely. She was there. We worked out bright and early every day. We swam, shopped, laid out, and had movie nights and dinner dates. We laughed, we cried, we took a million and one pictures. It felt like one of the many summers while growing up. My mom making dinner and asking if Brighteyes was going to be joining us. My dad teasing her relentlessly about how many guys she had fawning over her. Confusion ensuing because her and my baby brother share a name. When I started to get sick and eventually got put on bed rest, she was there. When I woke up from surgery and was stuck in the hospital, she was there. When I started to get unbelievably anxious, nervous, and slightly ill over the thought of seeing my man again, she was there to qualm my many irrational fears. She was there on the 17.5-hour drive from Arizona to San Antonio, TX singing Backstreet Boys, Celine Dion, and Britney Spears. She was more than happy to attend BMT graduation with me. She was nearly as excited and proud of him as I was. We had a blast my husband, proxy husband, and I.

I did take some time to visit Mr. Superman while he was at Tech School but made a return to my proxy for a few weeks before journeying with Mr. Superman to our first duty station. We went 5 months without seeing each other and our first reunion was glorious. It was short but glorious nonetheless. Our second reunion just came to a close yesterday and putting her on the plane inspired just as many tears as when I said farewell to Mr. Superman. What makes our friendship even better is the fact that Brighteyes and Mr. Superman love each other so much for the sole purpose of each one loving me. We all hang out, talk, laugh, and have the best times together.

I love my husband. I love my proxy husband just as much. She was and continues to be the person that keeps me up instead of down, happy instead of sad, and sane instead of, well you get the jist. She will continue to be in my life forever and thank heavens for that because when our first deployment hits, her proxy husband duties will not only be necessary and mandatory but incredibly appreciated.


As a side note and response to the many questions of whether or not we are related... no. Mr. Superman says we act identical though and funny little story, when I put her on the plane after her visit and I'm crying and she's wiping my tears, the security lady asked if we were twins. Her response? "Nope. Best friends. We even act alike though so sorta like twins."

8 comments:

♥Miss Brittney♥ said...

What a great post! Its so amazing to have such a good friend in your life, especially one that will stick around when times are hard. I definitely had a proxy husband these past ten months my husband has been gone. Mine was my big sis...we did everything together, including movie nights, watching our favorite girly tv shows, cooking dinners every week, laughing, shopping, and just being there for one another. Thank God I had her only 3 minutes away from my house...I dont know how I would have made it without her!! Great post!!

Jessica @ {Mis}Adventures of an Army Wife said...

Every military wife definitely needs a proxy husband! I call mine my "battle buddy", but the concept is still the same. I wouldn't have made it through this deployment with out her!

I Am a Marine's Girl said...

Aw! She sounds amazing! You're lucky to have a bestie like that, they're hard to find :D

Chelle said...

I have a proxy too but I need one closer to me sometimes. My proxy & I have been together for 20 someodd years now. We are polar opposites but we always know when the other needs something. I love it. Sadly though she's in San Diego still and I'm in friggen one branch hillbilly land. *snicker*

But yes Proxy's are the best!

Sarah Ann said...

That is so sweet! You're lucky to have such an amazing friend that helped you through so much.

Maranda said...

Awwwwww! What a sweet post! You are so lucky to have such an amazing person in your life. I think I need to find me one of these proxy husbands...

starberri321 said...

You two are both amazingly beautiful and awesome!!

KelseyC said...

This was such a good post. I loved it. It's so amazing how you can have that one (or two haha) person there for you unconditionally. Both your husband and proxy husband. :)