Language of Love

Alright, I know all of you know the language of love but despite common belief, it is not French and it most certainly is NOT universal. Every one has their own dialect and interprets it very differently. It is not constant but ever changing just like your love.

Dating: Words like baby, babe, lover, sweets, babycakes, and other baked goods sprinkle your conversation about every 2 words. You try your hardest to be cute all the time and you know exactly what words push his buttons to get exactly what you want.

Newlywed: Very similar to dating. The pet names still hang around but now instead of using just the right combination of words to get a new purse or shoes, you use your sweet talk (and perhaps a bribe or two; yes I went there) to get help with hanging your newly framed wedding photos. Your PMS only comes out every once in a while when you don’t have enough energy to keep up the “I’m cute all the time and the perfect woman” pretense all the time.

Anytime Passed Newlywed: You’ve really adjusted to each other. He knows not to bug you during your tv shows (he may even watch a good chunk of them with you) and you know not to bug him during his. There are a few nicknames that have stuck like “Babycakes” and “Loverface” but there’s also a, “Good morning Booger.” and a, “Hey Stinky!” sprinkled in there too. You still use your sexual favors bribes sweet words to coerce him into helping you but its usually for stuff like folding laundry, taking out the trash, or weeding the hedges.Your PMS raises its snarling head every few weeks without fail and shaving your legs is for Friday nights or Church. Even though things have changed, you are more in love than ever. He is without a doubt, your best friend, your reason for living, and the one thing that in those inexplicably tough, difficult, sometimes seemingly impossible to get through life moments, that makes getting out of bed worth it.

This post was inspired by a text. Kinda. Mr. Superman got a mid-week shift change from days to swings so a lot of our conversation today has been through text. We were talking about how I ate alone and wasn't feeling well. He suggested a bath. I said, "Perhaps." He told me he was sorry he couldn't offer help and I said don't apologize. He said it was his job and I told him his job was to be sexy and that he succeeded. Mr. Superman,"Oh is that so? Well it is certainly not without effort." Mrs. S, "I bet. Hardest job in the world?" Mr. Superman, "Ha ha not quite. Close though but only because the woman I love is so hard to please."

The conversation continued but it got me thinking about our word play. We verbally spar, just for fun, several times a day. Give us a break, we have no kids, no pets, and live in a small house. Then thinking about our episodes of word play, I began thinking about how our language of love has changed over the last four years. Mr. Superman has drastically improved in his word sparring. He still loses every time but he has begun to hold his own. Take Tuesday for instance. You know how I said I was sorely tempted to eat Mac & Cheese and skip my work out? Well I did in fact, eat the Mac & Cheese. It was Mr. Superman's Mac & Cheese. I texted him and told him, "I'm really sorry but I ate your last cup of Mac & Cheese. It was super delicious." His response? "You ate my Mac & Cheese?! You lint-licker!" I laughed out loud and then became extraordinarily proud.

How has your language of love changed over the years??

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(Mr. Superman getting ready for work today at 2 in the afternoon. Strange to say the least. Oh he does have the "sexy in my uniform" thing down pat. Le sigh.)

♥ Mrs. S.


Marie said...

Seriously your date, newlywed and after made me laugh.

You got it down to the T. :)

Anonymous said...

I loved this post.

Our language (since we are still in the dating phase) has actually changed over the years and we actually didn't start using "cute" names like baby, sweetie, etc until after our first year of dating and at first we used it EVERY OTHER WORD or something along those lines and then we started dwindling a little bit. I can totally see us once we are married though calling each other smelly and stinky since my mom does it to me all the time. =)

Again, great post! <3

Steph said...

That's pretty much how it works in our house too.

Anonymous said...

Oh what a marvelous post! This is so true.

Stefanie said...

Have you read The 5 Love Languages? It's a great book, and many places will send it to you for free! Check out the chapel and see if they will give you a copy, or militaryonesource.com has it on audiobook for free!

JG said...

Bahaha. That fact that he called you a lint-licker makes me lawl. :) I think it's part of maturing, too. We are different people, both individually and as a couple, than we were this time last year. It's natural for our languages to change to reflect it.

Team Mama said...

Hopefully when you've been married almost 24 years he won't forget that it's your birthday and 20 people are coming over for a cookout and no- it's not the daughter's softball party so he CAN'T stay and work late! Not that that EVER has happened to me- I'm just saying that hopefully it won't happen to you!!!

Tylaine said...

What a sweet post! I loved your dating, newlywed, after stages :)
Yes it is definately hard sometimes learning to use eachother's love language. Even after almost 10 years we still need work!

Sarah Ann said...

This is such a sweet post. I couldn't agree more with what you said. Though I'm not really sure what you'd call our love language. Arguing? Lol.
And it sucks that he's been switched to swings. I hope it's not permanent (as permanent as anything military related can be anyway)? Nick just actually got switched from swings to days about 3 weeks ago. It's been Heaven! Spending evenings alone sucked but because he does 12 hr shifts a lot spending the night alone was even worse.

Lindsay said...

Test Post for the New Design : ) Please Ignore : )

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Lindsay said...

OMG! I laughed when I read "lint-licker"! Funny!

This is an awesome post.

Chelle said...

Im jealous! We used to talk like that but lately we've hit that crappy bump where communication sucks and it takes everything not to strangle the other person.